If a room is full of service people who are they serving?

It's a classic dilemma when you get a bunch of service minded individuals together, which I noticed again on a Wed night. After an hr of meditation and an hr of discussion we eat dinner. Immediately when the dinner transition occurs there is a rush to the kitchen to help, a rush to set up the dining area, and then after dinner there is a rush to do the dishes. There is some fun and playfulness in the jostling back and forth for the opportunity to do the dishes, but this time as I watched the scene play out it made me think about this dilemma. When everyone wants to help/serve then who is there left to serve? In the office when there is a cake and they start passing around the slices on plates inevitably the plates make a full circle. In the cake scenario no one wants to be the one to "stop" the flow. Don't get me wrong I think service and selflessness is important, but it is just as important to be the recipient of the acts. With Karma Kitchen one of the things that is stressed in the very beginning is that before serving all volunteers should be guests to experience the true essence of the restaurant. I also think that the real meaning and intent of some of these acts gets lost in the jockeying for a role. It also makes me wonder about the person who isn't forward and aggressive about helping. Should they be denied an opportunity to serve if they aren't able to hold their own against someone like myself?

The de-Evolution of Video

On the plane returning from my recent vacation I saw a documentary on The Beatles.  The documentary while lacking the music of The Beatles (likely due to the high cost of acquiring the rights to Beatles songs) had plenty of video footage showing The Beatles many live performances on television.  Last night I was watching some episodes of VH1 Storytellers, which had live performances by Kanye, Jay-Z, and Mary J Blige.  The de-evolution of the live music performance on video was very apparent to me as I contrasted these performances.  The Beatles performances were often one (at the most two) camera angles and there was minimal editing as the camera looked directly at the band.  The band likely was told they can't move around much, because they had to stay in the frame.  Contrast that with modern performances where the artist paces, jumps, skips, and dances all around the stage enjoying the freedom of a completely wireless system.  That isn't the distracting part though, because I think even with an artist moving around like a grasshopper two cameras would still manage fine (one from far and zoomed in).  Unfortunately that was not how these performances were filmed.  They had no fewer than three cameras each panning and zooming as often as the artist moved.  Even worse was the quick edits.  I would guess that no more than 30 seconds elapsed before a cut to a different angle.  This frentic pacing made it difficult to really watch the artist and enjoy what is most interesting about live performances on video.  I think this argument has been made before, but I'll make it again and blame this de-evolution on MTV.  I think MTV pioneered this kind of rapid cut editing, which as I recall when it first came out gave the performance a more edgy feel.  Now it just seems dated and trying too hard. 

Lessons from the Point #4

After taking the summer off from tutoring, because there was no one to tutor I was back for my first day earlier this week.  I was excited to be back and the kids remembered me, asked where I was all summer, and asked what I was up to.  During my 'vacation' I forgot what it was like to see/hear what these kids go through, experience, and live.  That all came back to me real fast on my second day back.

I was helping a third grader with his homework, teaching him what multiplication is (that's a story in itself), when a lady walked in.  She seemed somewhat loopy, but I thought nothing of it since I didn't know her (and in California I have met plenty of loopy people).  She kept telling lady who runs the Homework Room that she just needed her to look after her kids a little bit.  She brought in 3-4 kids none older than third grade.  After she left the HW room organizer approached me and told me how upset it made her when people do that.  "Do what?" I asked.  Her response in complete bewilderment told me all I needed to know.  "You didn't realize?  She was high out of her mind."  I should clarify that when I say high I'm not referring to marijuana, but hard drugs.  The parents and addicts that come through the Point are addicts and recovering addicts of heroin or crack most of the time.  It didn't even occur to me that she was high, because as I said I had never met her before so as far as I could tell that was how she was normally. 

That evening after all the kids had left the organizer asked me what I thought of teaching "addicted kids" (kids who were born addicted to hard drugs b/c of their mother's addictions).  I told her I didn't know, because I wasn't aware I had any experience with it.  It seems that all of the kids I worked with that day were children of addicts and were born addicted to drugs.  The most telling sign was that I would go over something repeatedly, but it didn't seem to stick.  I'm not talking about complicated concepts, but simple multiplication using physical representation. 

Knowing three couples who are all expecting it is very difficult to be at the Point and see the other extreme of parenting.  The three couples that we know are all wonderful people and will make amazing parents.  It makes me sad to see the innocent victims of such careless and wanton disregard for life.  No one can stop someone if they don't want to take care of themselves, but why drag someone so innocent and helpless down at the same time?

The unspoken language

A few months ago I opened the building door (that was slightly ajar) and let it slam shut behind me as I went out to run an errand.  When I returned I noticed an older grandfather that lives on our floor with his wife, son, and daughter in law milling about outside our building.  This grandfather seems to be of Arabic descent based on his clothes and appearance, but does not speak English.  Through a series of gestures I realized that the building door was left ajar by Gramps so he could let himself back in and I had left him stuck outside.  He didn't seem the least bit concerned and after I let him in he graciously patted me on the back, thanking me. 

After that incident I occasionally would pass Gramps in the hall and he would smile and nod his head ever so slightly.  The other night the HyWy and I were coming in the building and he was right behind us.  As the three of us entered the elevator we all exchanged smiles and this being the HyWy's first interaction she didn't really know about the language barrier so she instinctively asked how he was doing.  As a sidenote it is worth mentioning that the HyWy loves grandparents especially ones that remind her of her own grandparents (ie foreign, not necessarily fluent in English, etc.).  Back in the elevator Gramps looked at both of us and smiled.  He pointed at me then at the HyWy as if asking whether we were married.  We both nodded our heads in confirmation.  Then he looked at the HyWy, gave a subtle smile, one thumb up, and looked at me obviously telling me what a wonderful wife I have found:).  Then out of nowhere he reached out and gave me a hug.  I was completely surprised beaming with an ear to ear smile. 

Through both interactions the thing that stands out in my mind is while Gramps' smile was subtle his eyes spoke volumes.  He also speaks through gestures, back pats, and other non verbal means.  All this was summed up eloquently and simply by the HyWy's statement when we entered the apartment, which also led to the post's title...the unspoken language is so beautiful and powerful. 

Security vs. Personal Dignity

In the past people have asked my thoughts on racial profiling particularly at airports in the wake of 9/11. I'm pretty sure I have been profiled on several occasions and it never really bothered me. My view was always to the effect of: if profiling helps prevent even one terrorist act then I'm willing to be subjected to it (after all what difference does it make if I have nothing to hide...besides a little inconvenience).

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Friday on my return from vacation during a layover in Toronto I seriously reconsidered my above position and statement. After going through a relatively smooth arrival in Toronto, baggage claim, customs, immigration, and baggage recheck I was to go back through security prior to my next flight. While my stuff was waiting on the conveyor to go through the scanner a young security guy (younger than me for sure) informed me I was "randomly" selected for further screening and made a note of it on some tracking sheet (presumably there is a quota on the number of "randoms" required per hour/day). I understand that I was wearing baggy jeans and sporting a pretty overgrown beard (my razor went home with the HyWy on a different flight...doh!), but interestingly there was a gentleman in front of me receiving the "special" treatment who was a clean cut business type. The similarity between both of us was that he was of a beige skin tone and I would classify myself as brown (or caramel:). Anyways once through the metal detector with my boarding pass securely in the security personnel's possession I was asked to step to one side where I was wanded. After the wanding I was frisked completely two times and so thorougly that in my mind I was only one step away from a strip search. During the frisking the inside of my pants waistband was checked and my wallet/passport rummaged through. Once this was complete my entire backpack was searched. All books were flipped through, the HyWy's spices were given a cursory look, and all the little pockets of my backpack emptied. Naturally the security guy was reasonably polite and attempted to repack everything. However, I couldn't help but feel humiliated through this. I wasn't humiliated because other people around me could see what I was going through, but rather because it occurred to me that the security personnel had total power in this situation. I knew that I could not express any frustration, anger, or negative emotion as they had me by the boarding pass. Finally the process ended and I was sent on my way.

The first thing I thought about as I walked off, fuming, was is there a better way to find the "bad" guys? Do other non brown/beige/caramel individuals experience things like this? Would I feel different if I found out that the profiling in my situation led to someone else on my flight being profiled and found with contraband and thus an incident was averted? My hesitation in answering the last question, to myself, tells me a lot.

The experience of travel...

This summer I have had the benefit of experiencing the enjoyment of travel from many perspectives.  In the past I might have scoffed at some of the different reasons or interests in traveling, but after the summer I have realized that whatever the reason the end result is the same: they were happy. 

There are people that travel almost exclusively for the passport stamp or to be able to say that they went to a particular country.  These are the same type of people that I was referring to in my post above about taking photos at major attractions.  I have a difficult time with this approach to travel, because it misses in my mind the main point of travel.  However, after showing a few visitors around over the summer that approached their visit with this mindset I realized that this was what made them happy.  

I might argue that I am the other extreme of the travel experience seeker, but I know that there are others.  I would like to avoid touristy places with their picture clicking hoardes (but sometimes still find myself there) and get much more out of a trip by staying for a few days in a particular area.  I enjoy being immersed in the culture of a region or area to understand how the locals live their lives.  For a long time I considered this to be the epitome of travel, but seeing people enjoy their touristy trips this summer I realized that it´s more about how in travel there is something for everyone.    

Documentation...

I hadn´t intended on blogging while out of the country, but this particular observation has been with me for two days now so I think it´s worth putting down. 

While taking a walking tour of the Alhambra I couldn't help but stop to notice the picture hungry tourists.  I was amazed by the number of people at the Alhambra and even today in Sevilla (at the Cathedral) who were clicking away nonstop.  The Cathedral today was a barrage of flash photography so much so that I felt like I was a celebrity on the red carpet.  The HyWy made a good point about how amazing it would be if major monuments would not allow photography of any kind and what an effect it would have on the tourist experience.  We both agreed that the experienced would be significantly different for the photographer and the person affected by the photography.  I don´t believe the photographers are truly experiencing the beauty they are surrounded by because they are absorbed in capturing the ¨next great Nat´l Geographic Photo¨or great photo for Facebook.  I understand the need to capture memories, but at a certain point I think people are blindly shooting everything that seems good.  It is definitely distracting from my experience of the particular attraction, but how do you sway 20+ individuals clicking away.  I think this tendancy has grown in the last 5-10 years with the proliferation of digital cameras such that every individual seems to fancy themselves as they next Ansel Adams.  I´m sure I am being harsh, but I think I´m just being real. 

Where I was...

Last Friday marked the 8th anniversary of the attacks of September 11th and every year on the anniversary I read stories about people remembering where they were on that day. For some reason I'm always intrigued by where people were on that day and how they found out about the events that unfolded in New York City. Growing up I heard my parents recollections of famous moments in history (often deaths) with the same degree of interest. Where my Dad was when he heard about the assassination of JFK, where my Mom was when she heard about the eruption of Mt. St. Helens, or where they both were when they heard about John Lennon.

I remember the day very vividly. I was walking down a back ally on campus towards the fall career fair at the basketball arena that would kick off my final two semesters at Tech. I was walking behind a guy who saw someone he knew walking by. The passerby asked his friend whether he had heard about what was going on. The response was as in many cases one of query and confusion, "no what's up?" The passerby responded that he should just check out CNN. I didn't think anything of it and continued on to the career fair. Once at the career fair it was a scene straight out of a movie as people were milling about watching the televisions all tuned to the same thing. I remember hearing someone ask what was going on and the reply stunned me, "a plane hit the World Trade Center." We watched in shock, sorrow, disbelief, and numbness as the second tower fell. Shortly thereafter a friend who was working the career fair said that they were going to shutdown campus and that I should dump all my resumes as fast as I could on as many companies as possible. On the drive home taking a back road to avoid traffic I remember listening to the radio and tears just streaming down my face. I would spend the next 6 to 8 hrs in front of the television like many others. At one point my Mom called completely confused and in the dark over what was going on. She was by herself in Singapore, my Dad away on business in Paris, awoken to this nightmare by a phone call from India. Through the tears and the sobs all she kept asking was why would someone do this.

Barely a month later in a fit of frustration over a personal problem I fled to the only place that felt comfortable and oddly enough one of the last places to seek it: New York City. I can still see the glow from Ground Zero. I can still smell the mixture of smoke, dust, and who knows what else.

One day I will tell someone how I remember exactly where I was on September 11th.

The crutch of a cell phone

In my mind the cell phone is the ultimate social crutch.  I'm sure everyone has seen this in action so often that it looks normal.  It is impossible to go into a club, bar, or any social venue by yourself without feeling the need to pull out your cell phone and do something.  Something could mean anything, but you just have to be on your phone LOOKING like you are communicating so that the rest of the world knows that you aren't a complete loner.  I know that there are people out there that are meeting people or coordinating plans.  However, I've met people in bars/clubs before and it doesn't take a rocket scientist.  It does not necessitate working away feverishly on your phone.  Maybe it's the only child in me, but I have no problem going to anything by myself and have done so numerous times.  It seems that just sitting around idly people watching makes people feel uncomfortable so they crutch themselves on their cell phone. 

Maybe the whole world is really meeting someone and I'm the loner just standing around watching.  If that is the case then I'm having a damn fun time along the way. 

What is that smell?

First things first...peanut gallery (you know who you are): no it's not me. 

Anyways when the HyWy left since it was now just me and I was cooking at home less I didn't realize how my garbage generation went down.  I expected a change in other things, but garbage is one of those things you don't really focus on.  So I kept using my regular large garbage bags.  Normally because we cook at home frequently we take the garbage out every few days and usually do so when it's full.  A week or two into my solo lifestyle I realized the kitchen was smelling kind of funky and it finally hit me that the garbage though not full is stankin' up the place.  An executive decision had to be made and I decided to switch to smaller bags and force myself to throw the trash out regularly (not just wait for it to fill up). 

I know it's not a big revelation, but really that's what this has been about all the little things that I haven't thought about before.  So it was pretty funny and I thought I might share it.

Spacewalking through my life

Today marks one month since the HyWy left for her trip and I was reflecting on what it has been like for me. I can definitely see some changes in how my days/weeks progress particularly with my comfort level in coming home to an empty house. However, I've also noticed another interesting aspect about my level of activity and how busy I am. I think I have already mentioned how one of the ways that I make the time pass quicker is by having visitors (overnight or just friends over for the evening). I'm also hosting some CouchSurfers now that most of my overnight visitors are done. I feel as though when the HyWy is at home she grounds me in my desire to do things whether by not wanting to do certain things or by making me aware to the fact that I'm spreading myself thin. An anology I made to a coworker was that I consider myself like an astronaut on a spacewalk with a tether that keeps me from drifting off into space. When I'm by myself I let that tether way out and I'm just drifting around doing my thing, which is not necessarily good/safe even though dodging space junk might be fun. With the HyWy around she usually draws me in a little more which is definitely better for me in the long run. For example with the CouchSurfers and visitors this weekend I had two friends over Thurs., my cousin over Fri/Sat, and then I was thinking about having some CouchSurfers on Sun/Mon. Ultimately it didn't happen with the CouchSurfers, but the HyWy would have looked at the situation and seen the more practical need for some downtime (thus pulling me in a bit). I'm sure this analogy may come across to my being kept on a leash, but that is not what I'm saying. The tether/leash just symbolizes how much I'm doing.

After rereading this post I'm laughing thinking about it and knowing that there are bound to be people who think I'm insane. HAHA!

I know this probably comes as no shock to most and it didn't really shock me either, but it's unnerving how many of the brands we use on a daily basis are owned by a handful of companies.  This all started when a few weeks ago Obama made a comment that he would have a beer with a Harvard professor and a Cambridge police chief.  At what is now being termed the beer summit Obama apparently was going to have a Bud Light and the professor a Blue Moon.  It then came out that apparently the White House only stocks "American" beers, which lead me to find out that Bud, Miller, and Coors (all supposed all-American beers) are all owned by large foreign companies.  More investigation leads me to conclude that a large majority of the products an average American uses/consumes on a daily basis come from one of the following companies: Proctor and Gamble, InBev, Nestle, Kraft, Coca Cola, and Unilever.  That's six companies that control over 1000 different brands ranging from Tide to Oreos, Fruitopia to Pringles, and Dove to Stella Artois. 

As people (at least in the Bay) are trying to eat more locally this is very scary to me.  It shows how difficult it is to truly know who you are giving your money to.  It's obviously easiest to control who you purchase from with produce, but with other products it becomes harder and harder.  I definitely feel that going forward I will take a harder look at the brands I purchase and be more aware of who they are really owned by.

On entitlement

I heard a radio bit the other day that reminded me of a conversation I had a few months ago about entitlement.  The gist of the bit was that the caller was having problems with her roommate wearing inappropriate clothing when the caller's boyfriend was around.  The two arguments being made were: as your roommate please respect the fact that someone close to me is uncomfortable when he comes over OR I pay my rent here and am therefore entitled to walk around wearing whatever I want. 

I don't know about other countries, but in the US I feel there is a culture of entitlement.  It starts with kids deserving the best or doing well on something so they deserve a reward.  As kids grow up they feel like they deserve a car or cell phone.  When they reach high school and college they feel they deserve the good/better grade.  From there it perpetuates into all areas of life until we find ourselves with adults who feel they deserve or are entitled to do things just because they paid some money.  This is typical in restaurants where people feel that because they have paid for their meal they are allowed to treat the waitstaff like crap.  I'm not sure where this ends.  With the roommate situation it can go on infinitely.  I pay my rent therefore I can do anything in the apartment that is not prohibited by the lease.  Cooking smelly food first thing in the morning.  Sorry it's my right.  Not cleaning up after myself.  Deal with it.  There has to be a point at which we own up for our actions and understand that living with people is a compromise.  I know the argument can be made that it is a compromise so the roommate should be able to wear what she wants.  Fair enough maybe the compromise is is that the boyfriend will come over less or not stay as late.  If you want to be able to wander around wearing whatever (or not wearing whatever) then maybe you should live on your own.  I think it's a pretentious attitude to think that because of what you paid you are entitled to anything beyond the obvious. 

Situation vs. Opportunity

I had a discussion earlier today with a friend in which I made a comment that a situation that I'm soon to be in was an opportunity for me to step outside my comfort zone.  My friend promptly corrected me saying that until the outcome of the situation is determined it is just that: a situation.  An opportunity implies that the situation resulted in a positive outcome.  I'm not sure what we would term a situation that yields a negative outcome, but that was never discussed.

I argued that a situation or opportunity are for the most part the same thing.  I'm sure there are subtle differences (and if you can delineate the two please comment away), but I couldn't really come up with any.  In my mind every situation one is in offers the opportunity to grow through the choices we make.  The choices and how we handle the situation might yield a positive or negative outcome, but the outcome is irrelevant.  It is what we take from the outcome that matters.  If we learn or grow from the experience in any capacity then I would argue that was some positive benefit. 

For example, the loss of someone close to you in your life is clearly a negative situation.  However, that doesn't mean that it is not an opportunity to learn about the impermanence of life, the need to live in the moment, and the importance of enjoying what time we have with our friends and loved ones.  Having experienced the loss of two loved ones in a little over a year I think both the HyWy and I would agree that they were very difficult experiences, but we both grew tremendously from the experience.  I won't say that they were positive experiences, but there was definitely something positive that we took away from them. 

Whatever you feel like

By nature I'm not a very picky person.  I just go with the flow.  That doesn't mean I never do what I want, but just when I really want to do something I make it known.  In general though things are easier for me when someone else offers input on what they want to do.  Now with the HyWy out of the picture for a while my indecisiveness has proven to be very difficult. 

Picture this as a typical Sunday afternoon when the HyWy was in town:

Me (as we walk back from Salsa by the Lake): What do you want to do tonight?

HW: I don't know.  What do you want to do?

Me: Well we could go see Harry Potter if you want.  Or we could chill at home, get ready for the week, etc.  It is a long movie and the next showing isn't until 830. 

HW: That's true I do want to see that.  But you're right I'm not sure I want to be out late b/c I have a big week ahead of me. [Ed. note: Alt response to follow] Yeah I know it's a long movie, but we really want to see it so let's just go tonight.

Now picture this same mental process without the HyWy:

Well I want to go see the movie.  But it's really late.  But I really want to see the movie.  But do I want to come home that late?  I could just go see the movie during the week.  But I don't have time this week.  But I want to see the movie.  AHHHH What do I do!?

I'm not saying that either of us makes the decisions about what we want to do as individuals, but rather sometimes it's easier to cop out and 'do what someone else wants' than making the decision myself.  Either way I have 2.5 months of making decisions on my own so I better get used to it. 

Table for one

With the HyWy off discovering the world there are obviously going to be some differences in my daily routine and life.  As I arrive at these realizations and observations I thought I would blog about them as an exercise in awareness.

Yesterday after I dropped her off at the airport I went into the city and had some breakfast.  I was at the breakfast place right when it opened and was quickly seated at the bar.  As I sat there watching and listening to the other solo diners I noticed a few things about my experience.  I think I have written about the experience of eating alone before, but I'm going to add to that.  First my meal goes by infinitely quicker when I'm eating by myself.  It's very easy to overlook how much of a restaurant experience is shaped by one's company.  If I don't have a book/newspaper to read I also wonder what I should do.  It's fun to people watch, but when you are facing a wall that is somewhat difficult to do without being obvious.  I've noticed that my day is quieter without anyone around and as a way to fill that space I call people more often. 

Bachelor Part 2

Today I dropped the HyWy off at the aiport to begin her journey.  I'm not sure how I feel right now.  I am feeling a combination of things including, but not limited to: excitement, anxiety, sadness, happiness, exhaustion, relief, and curiosity.  I did not include lonliness, because as she put it this morning there is a certain threshold of activity and time before lonliness sets in.  It may not set in.  It may come tomorrow.  It may come in a month.  I'm somewhat in fear of when it does come simply because of my last experience living on my own, in about 1998.  I know what all of you are saying...that was so long ago, you've changed so much since then, etc.  No doubt I have and it was.  However, the experience had such a profound impact on me and I have nothing to contrast it against it still scares me.  The differences between then and now are tremendous.  I have learned to cook.  Back then when I was in my dorm and first apartment, after my roommate was kicked out of school for grades, I ate less frequently.  This was mostly due to the fact that I didn't like to go to the dining hall by myself nor did I really know how to cook (save for quesadillas, pasta, and rice a roni).  I have a pretty solid schedule now.  Back then I was in college and while I had a schedule of classes I didn't have a schedule in my life.  During the week right now when the HyWy is around we usually come home from work, workout, cook dinner, and hang out.  There doesn't really have to be a major change to that.  I am more comfortable on my own.  In college when left on my own I didn't really know what to do (an odd thing for an only child).  Now with my eyes open to the options the choices are limitless (guitar lessons, books, concerts, climbing, running, exploring, etc.).  So as the HyWy has been saying and preparing me for this separation I think I've begun to agree with her.  It will be hard, but it won't be that bad. 

Understanding the back story

Tonight the HyWy and I had dinner with two college friends of my dad's.  I had met one of them, who had come from India, before, but this visit was different.  I'm sure during my previous meeting we had exchanged stories about my dad.  However, perhaps I am in a different place in my life, because this time around I felt more intrigued by these stories.  I've been fortunate to cross paths with many friends of my parents from before I was born and I enjoy these stories.  It occurred to me tonight as we learned about my mom's arrival into the US or my dad loaning someone cash for a car down payment that there is lot to be gained from these seemingly innocuous moments.  Not only are these stories very telling about a person's character, but they also offer a greater understanding of the backstory from where people come from. 

Here There and Everywhere

Right now I'm reading a book, Here There and Everywhere: My Life Recording the Beatles, and normally I would hold off reviewing it until I'm done.  However, with the majority of the book done I think my impression of the book will not significantly change.  This book is for one of two people: sound people or die-hard Beatles fans.  I am a part of the first group, who are people that find intricacies of the recording process and the innovations that came with recording the Beatles very interesting.  Die-hard Beatles fans will enjoy the trivial minutiae about everything the Beatles recorded between Revolver and the White Album (a few details about Abbey Road). 

What I have learned from this book is that while I certainly agree that the Beatles (mostly McCartney and Lennon) were great lyricists I don't know if they were equally good musicians.  I'm sure that I could get skewered for this in some circles, but I don't think the less than 10 readers of this blog will take too much offense to this statement.  Compared to their contemporaries of that time there were other musicians and groups that were in my opinion far greater among them Pink Floyd, Fleetwood Mac (the Peter Green incarnation), The Yardbirds, and The Rolling Stones (the original lineup).  I also feel like more than other groups the Beatles sound was tremendously improved by the engineers that worked on their albums.  Many of the techniques that are standard rules of thumb in the industry today were originated with the Beatles and it is these stories that I enjoyed most. 

Buen Viaje ~ Happy Travels!

So the HyWy has quit her job and will be traveling to Spain for about 2.5 months.  If all goes well and I have time off I would like to visit her, but we would also like to go to India this year and that is more important.  If you are curious about what she plans on doing on this endeavor hit her up for details. 

 

This post is more about my thoughts and feelings towards one of the knee jerk reactions people have upon hearing this news.  What will you do?  My favorite response was by the HyWy to her coworkers, "he'll figure something out...he had a life before me."  Knowing the HyWy well enough I know that she wasn't being crass or thoughtless, but speaking the truth.  To be honest I don't know what I will do, but then again how can I let my fears stop her from doing what she wants to do?  Many have said that they could not live without their significant others for that long.  I don't live under any presumption that this will be easy as it most certainly will not.  However, one of the main tenets of our relationship has always been that we will help each other grow.  Help each other grow by sharing new experiences OR by standing by on the sideline as one embarks on a new path.  As this plan has taken form I have 100% been beside her encouraging her to do this and take these steps, because this is the best time as we have savings and I'll still be here working.  I think it would be very unfair of me to hold her back now particularly after she has been so supportive of me in my pursuit of alternative interests.  Many have praised us for being brave and courageous to try this out.  I think in their hearts everyone would like to be able to do this, but circumstances (or life) often gets in the way.  I believe that if anyone had the opportunity to support their significant other on a journey like this then they would do so themselves, because that is what love is. 

 

I look forward to the joys and difficulties that may come with this knowing that in the end it will be for the greater benefit. 

Do the Right Thing

Last night we went to a friend's house for one movie of a series they are doing as part of a summer film festival.  We saw Do the Right Thing, which is a summer classic by Spike Lee from 1989.  The movie takes place in the Bed-Stuy neighborhood of Brooklyn on one hot summer day.  The first two things that hit me before anything else was the vibrant colors that the production designer used for all the clothes and the number of now major stars who appeared in this movie. 

I don't want to give too much away to the film even though I think I might have been the last person on the planet to have seen it.  The movie highlights the very apparent racial tensions in Brooklyn between whites, blacks, Koreans, and Latinos.  At the end of the movie there are two conflicting quotes by Martin Luther King Jr. and Malcolm X, which I think have very direct connections to situations in Oakland today.  Obviously the MLK quote was about nonviolence and the Malcolm X quote was about the use of violence (in self defense), but both were directed at achieving justice.  After the film Spike Lee stated in an interview that viewers who question the justification of a riot (in the film) and subsequent destruction of property are implicitly valuing the white man's property over the life of a black man.  I was one of those viewers.  However, I apply my questions to the very recent riots in Oakland, which saw the destruction of property, among which were locally black owned businesses, following the murder black individual by white police officers.  Malcolm X implied in his quote at the end of the movie that in order to bring about change violence is necessary.  I don't agree with this, because in the situation in Oakland as I said in a previous post the violence had the effect of alienating the cause.  Furthermore, often in situations were a mob mentality takes over people are joining the looting/vandalization just for the 'fun' of it.  The type of violence that Malcolm X is advocating is more of a calculated thought out maneuver to make a point, but many of the people in the movie's riot (or even in Oakland or the Rodney King riots) were simply using the riot as a way to get material goods or have fun destroying things. 

Summer Movie #3: Up

Last weekend we went to see Up, the latest Pixar movie.  As with most Pixar movies I feel like they are either spot on (Finding Nemo, Ratatouille, Wall-E) or not (Cars).  Up was spot on.  Many of Pixar's movies focus on worlds that are unfamiliar to us such as the perspective of rats, toys, cars, fish, superheroes, etc.  However, Up was the first in my mind to show a world that was for the most part familiar to all of us in one way or another.  I also like that recently Pixar is taking a direction with more mature themes, which in this case was the pursuit of your dreams vs the realities of life.  The underlying lesson in Up was that it is important to always have dreams to aspire to, but it is equally important to recognize that when those dreams don't pan out the ride is still enjoyable.  I guess it was Pixar's way of saying that the journey is more important than the destination. 

My favorite part of the movie was the first half hour or so, because it provides a good deal of context into the character's intentions.  I was interested to see if they would explain why the main character ties a bunch of balloons to his house and why he was such a curmudgeon.  Overall in my mind this movie is on par with the best of Pixar's movies and is also better than Star Trek for this summer. 

The Foolanthropist

I was sucked in on Wed night by the promise of what turned out to be one of the most least thought out asinine TV pilots I have ever seen.  The Philanthropist's premise is a billionaire who in the midst of a Nigerian hurricane has a crisis of conscience when he has a chance encounter with a little boy that reminds him of his late son.  This brief revelation disengages him from his glitzy and glamorous billionaire Richard Bransonesque lifestyle.  Upon returning to the US he once again traipses off to Nigeria in search of the town that the nameless boy said he was from.  Along the way meets a relief worker who is trying to transport vaccines to a remote village that is near the village he is trying to reach.  However, the vaccines are stuck in a corrupt customs lock up.  Promising to deliver the vaccines to a village our "hero" manages to buy off enough people, get himself arrested, solicit the help of a local drug kingpin, and get into a run-in with the DEA.  All this is before the real "action" starts, which is when after finding himself in the thick of the jungle the Foolanthropist manages to travel 25 kilometers by motorbike, without shoes, without food/water, and without any form of direction.  I'm not sure what is more absurd that the producers thought that they could convince their audience that he got through heavy jungle without food or map OR that I was part of the audience that was thought to buy into this premise. 

Anyways forgetting all the glaringly obvious coincidences and luck that the "hero" had I still have a major overarching problem with this show.  It reiterates the theory that if you have limitless capital and no heart you can do wonders in the world.  It is not that easy.  Sure money does take care of many of the problems and if you are a billionaire you can remove many obstacles.  What about the real heroes of the story?  The aid worker who was there long before the "hero" and will be there long after he leaves.  The best part of the whole show was a monologue that the aid worker has where she tells off the "hero" for thinking that he can come in there with all his money, do a little bit of good to ease his conscience, and then go back to the US and tell his friends what amazing things he did.  Unfortunately that little tidbit was probably missed by most of the audience as they were probably caught up in the adventure of the whole show.  I'm sure the same argument could be made about many of us who travel to do service work in India or other areas, but the major difference is that when we go the only things we have to offer is our compassion, our smiles, our dedication, and our hardwork. 

The Range

I went to a shooting range last night with some friends and had some fun doing some target shooting.  I won't go into the details of the guns I shot mostly because that's irrelevant and I don't really know myself.  All I know is that I shot pistols similar to what is standard military issue. 

I realized two things while we were shooting.  First guns are incredibly loud.  Of course stupid, right?  Well I have been somewhere that multiple guns are being shot before and it was outside.  Alternatively I have been shooting indoors, but we were the only ones shooting for the most part.  Now multiple people shooting guns indoors is really freaking loud.

I also realized that my adrenaline was through the roof when we were shooting.  My heart was doing 180bpm and I felt like it was an out of body experience.  Once I was done and we were in the car heading back I couldn't stop yawning.  I got home at 930 and literally went straight to bed, because I think after being amped up on adrenaline when I eventually came down I was exhausted. 

Both of these realizations have made me wonder about how police and military personnel do their jobs.  I think about the shootout that saw 4 cops get killed earlier this year and I wonder how it must have felt in that situation.  Certainly the movies don't accurately portray any of this, but it always looks easier than it is.

Untitled

For some reason I haven't really felt like writing recently.  That doesn't mean I haven't had inspiration to write.  Quite the contrary in fact while not wanting to write I have had several topics that I wanted to write about pop in my head, but have never quite got them out.  So now I'll do the blog equivalent of a pav bhaji or minestrone soup (that is put several unconnected ideas into one post just to clean out the "fridge"). 

Doubt

A few weekends ago we saw this movie.  Wow.  Not particularly intense, but still somewhat unnerving and somewhat crazy.  I don't think you can really give away the plot of the movie, because it has a bit of an open ended conclusion.  However, without giving anything away the premise of the movie is that Meryl Streep is the headmistress at a 1960s Catholic school and she has a bone to pick with Philip Seymour Hoffman who is the priest of the parish.  The thing that stayed with me after the movie is how manipulative and single minded Meryl Streep's character is.  She would stop at nothing to see her desired outcome achieved.  Even when the cards were stacked against her and it was clear that she was wrong she still manipulated the situation. 

As a side note I have to say that Meryl Streep never ceases to amaze me.  She has played some truly villanous and evil characters (Manchurian Candidate and arguably The Devil Wears Prada), but she has also played some beautiful characters (upcoming Julie and Julia and Music of the Heart).  She definitely has some depth. 

Point Break Live

At the other end of the spectrum of acting is a complete ridiculous and campy theatrical stage version of Point Break.  I really wanted to see this for my birthday, but we had to wait until we could get tickets.  It was hysterically horrible.  I loved it.  If you haven't seen the movie I think the live version would be pretty crappy, but even with some recollection of the original it was pretty good.  The HyWy felt it was just an excuse for guys to run around, act like idiots, and throw beer on each other/the crowd.  The highlight of the whole experience was watching them cast the role of Keanu Reeves from the audience with lines to be read from cue cards so that the acting most closely resembled his bodacious one. 

Sandman

This really deserves a post of it's own and if I can come up with something better then I might move it.  I finally finished the epic 10 part Sandman series and it was awesome.  I don't know how it was written or how it was envisioned, but I'm pretty sure Neil Gaiman hadn't forseen the whole series as one when he was writing.  This is part of the beauty of the series that he was able to weave such a complicated and complete story together over so many episodes.  The whole series is 75 episodes and by the time it ends there are references to characters and events from the very beginning.  There were also different artists who contributed to the each episode so that there are a variety of visual styles some of which are definitely better than others.  I think this is a series that I will likely purchase down the road to have, because it was well written and visually stunning.  Bear in mind by no stretch of the imagination do I recommend this for everyone, because it is at points very graphic (violently and sexually). 

Forgiveness

Why is it easier to forgive someone else than yourself? 

Last night I accidentally spilled some liquid on myself, the couch, and most importantly our old computer.  This computer is on the last legs of it's life and has been for some time now.  If someone else had done this to my computer I wouldn't have been to frustrated.  After all I have apparently had my phone dropped in a tub of water (yet it works), a nice pilsner glass broken, my car rear ended, a bracelet torn off my hand, a favorite book that was part of a boxed set lost, and I'm sure if I keep racking my brain I can come up with some others.  In the moment these were all a big deal and I wasn't happy to lose (or suffer damage) these items.  However, I was quick to realize that they were material things and their loss or damage was not catastrophic.  So I never held any grudge against the responsible parties and it was water under the bridge after a short while.  However, with the computer I was the one at fault and I really held it over my head.  I was frustrated and dwelling on it for the rest of the evening.  The computer was the HyWy's and she even told me that I shouldn't sweat it.  But then it all made sense when I realized that it is so much easier to forgive others, but it's hard to forgive yourself.  I don't know why.

Shout outs

So two of the five people that probably read this blog made a request that they get shout outs AND nicknames. 

We met up with our friends, V-40 and PK da Speak, last week for a belated birthday dinner in the city.  We went to an Indonesian restaurant followed by dessert at high end vegan restaurant.  Whenever we end up at a Indonesian or Malaysian restaurant I flash back to memories of Singapore when my parents introduced me to roti parathas.  At the time I had them enjoyed them and forgot them.  Then I came to the Bay and I was reintroduced.  Oh roti parathas how I love you and how much I have missed you and your dipping sauce. 

Right so something interesting that we found out about through PK da Speak and V-40 was a 'new' old movie,  It was made in 2007, but it's still going through some festivals and having limited releases hence why it's 'new'.  The Pool is a movie similar to Slumdog Millionaire, but there sounds like there is much more to this.  Check it out if it sounds interesting and if we watch it you'll probably see it up here. 

Summer Movie #2: Star Trek

Last weekend the HyWy and I went to see the second of the big summer blockbusters, Star Trek. 

It was a well paced movie that mixed good action, good acting and characters, humor, and a reasonable plot.  The weakest point of the whole movie was the plot, but for whatever reason time travel seems to be JJ Abrams' thing (see Lost).  Outside of the plot though the casting was almost impeccable with actors who managed to channel the "older" versions of themselves without seeming like they were doing a William Shatner or DeForest Kelley impersonations.  It was impressive to see that this was a movie that had the ability to appeal to a wide range of fans (a problem with Watchmen): somewhat longtime Star Trek fans and people who had no clue about Star Trek.  However, my guess from hearing conversations is that the movie misses the mark with the really dedicated Trekkie (or Trekker) fanbase, which was something that was predicted from the beginning.  With such a large budget it was impressive to see some of the larger scale scenes both digitally created (as the Enterprise was being built) and real sets (the engine room in Enterprise).  Overall I think at this point this is the stronger of the two big summer movies I have seen. 

CYA

The acronym says it all and it is everywhere in the modern office.  Cover your ass. 

Currently I'm trying to find out some information based on a hypothetical situation that could likely occur in my near future.  I have never had such a hard time getting answers.  In the ever present landscape of lawsuits, suing, etc. no one wants to give advice or recommendations on a generalized question.  The constant answer is some form of, 'we can't advise you on that, because you might not be using our services and another service provider might have a different policy.'  Amazingly after poking around on the Internet for a while I found a general statement referring to the state regulation of this service on a particular service provider's website.  Anyways the frustrating part about this exercise is that everyone is so concerned with looking out for their "back" that no realizes that by the time I'm in the situation and check with the new provider it will be too late.  It's a catch-22 I guess brought on by the increase in lawsuits, but I would venture to guess that for every 10 lawsuits there are probably 2-3 that are irrational.  So we are screwed over because of 20-30% of the crappy lawsuits affecting the rest of society. 

Summer Movie #1: X-Men Origins: Wolverine

I'm pretty sure that I will be watching all the big summer blockbusters except for a select few (Angels & Demons).  That said I thought it would be worthwhile to write my thoughts on each of them after I see them so I can look back on it at the end of the summer.

The first big movie of the summer was X-Men Origins: Wolverine.  This was a good way to start off the summer season, because it throws us right into what a summer movie is all about: a huge budget, action, special effects, and a pretty thin plot.  I don't have very high expectations for a high quality movie when I go to see the summer blockbusters and this hit about right where I would have expected.  I expected a little more from the X-Men franchise in terms of plot, but this movie was not made by the same team that brought us the rest of the movies.  So the plot was weak, but that was fine.  I enjoyed the action sequences and I liked that Gambit's character was finally introduced into the series.  They worked very hard to tie the whole story back to where the first X-Men movie picks up and they managed that for the most part.  I do wish that they were able to spend less time trying to make it fit neatly to the beginning of the first X-Men movie and more time on Wolverine's life prior to X-Men.  Overall this was a middle of the road summer movie that was mostly held up by it's action and special effects.

Kamikaze Heart

The HyWy, a friend, and I went to the circus last night.  I know the images that conjure up in people's head when one says the word circus: a big tent, elephants, clowns, etc.  This wasn't quite that kind of circus.  It was closer to Cirque de Soleil than it was to Ringling Brothers.  Really though it was something entirely different.  This was City Circus' Kamikaze Heart.  There was a two person live precussion band, there were breakdancers, there was clown type entertainment (not clowns for those of you who dislike clowns), there were acrobats, and then there were aerial acrobats (that's what I decided to call them, because they use rope or scarves to do amazing acrobatic stuff). 

There was a sense of a story that went along with the show and in typical San Francisco fashion it was part fantasy, hearts flying to the moon, and part reality, boy falls in love with grantwriter.  The story was a bit strange and hard to follow, but I didn't need the story at all.  The performers were had my attention the whole night.  The performers ranged in age from about 10 to 30.  I remember seeing Cirque de Soleil as a kid and being fascinated by the things people did.  At the time I thought it was because I was a kid, but last night City Circus was certainly able to recapture that sense of amazement.  The performers that blew me away the most were the aerial acrobats that would do things with ropes, hoops, and scarves that I can't even begin to convey here.  There was also this inherent joy on all their faces that showed how much they loved doing this.  It was particularly evident in the face of the youngest castmember, an acrobat.  Kamikaze Heart is in it's second weekend of performances and you could still see the excitement just overflowing from this young girl.  As if all the performers weren't enough the music was wonderful.  Part of the soundtrack was prerecorded original pieces, part were mainstream songs that must have been licensed, and part were live pieces.  The website promised beatboxing, which was so seamlessly integrated into the soundtrack that I had to think just to pick out the parts.  The reason the percussion duo was so great was because they got to interact on occasion with the performers.  I also can't remember if I have ever seen breakdancing performed to live music, which in a way reminded me of classical Indian dancing accompanying classical music. 

Overall I highly recommend this circus if for no other reason than to remember the awe of seeing something really cool as a child.  The tickets were 17 bucks total for unreserved general admission seats and the theater is the right size so that there are no bad seats. 

36 hrs in Oakland

So the New York Times did a piece on how to spend 36 hrs in Oakland.  I disagree with them on several of their recommendations so I'm writing my own 36 hrs in Oakland.  I'm removing anything I disagree with or have not done, because I can't recommend stuff that I haven't done myself.

Friday 5pm
A Sidebar beside the Lake
A new spot just opened on Lake Merritt, Sidebar, on the Lakeshore side.  It's a pretty chill bar/restaurant with well priced food and very good cocktails.  I think it would be a good place to start an evening, close out a long week, or somewhere to go after getting off a flight.  All the cocktails on the menu have a locavore version (made with local ingredients and alcohols) and the classic version (made the traditional way with the typical ingredients). 

6pm
Shouro to get you
Who knew that Telegraph Ave in Oakland is a hot bed of East African cuisine?  Well go to Cafe Colucci at Telegraph and Alcatraz to get a good introduction into Ethopian food.  I love this place so much that I can't bring myself to go somewhere else.  The food is eaten communely (ie everyone eating with their hands out of one plate) so it makes for an interesting experience for people not comfortable eating with their hands.  The vegetable plate, shouro, and mushroom tibs are our favorite.  After talking with some Ethiopian friends in Atlanta they were so excited to hear that we were able to try vegetarian Ethiopian food they wanted to come out and try it themselves.  Don't miss out on the anjeera (the bread you eat with the food) especially the one that the food is served on, because it soaks up all the goodness and finishing off with that is great.  They also have some wonderful honeywine.

7:30pm
Movies and music
The Grand Lake movie theater is right off of Lake Merritt and is an amazingly well kept old theater.  You can catch first run movies as well as occasional classics.  Alternatively there is the Paramount, which regularly shows classics such as North by Northwest and also has concerts.  Movies at the Paramount are a great experience complete with an organ player, a cartoon or two, a newsreel, and a raffle.  The Paramount is justifiably receiving stiff competition from the recently renovated Fox Theater, but hopefully both theaters will continue to thrive. 

Saturday 10am
Aunt Mary's cookin'
Not your typical breakfast joint with standard omlettes and pancakes Aunt Mary's puts a good twist on their food.  There are standards such as the Cajun french toast soaked in a whiskey custard sauce and Migas, but when we went there was a great corn bread encrusted frittata.  The space is very big and roomy, which means the wait shouldn't be too long and if it is there is a nice sitting area with books for the kids.  Sitting at the counter we were engaged in watching the chefs cooking we didn't even realize it had been a bit of a wait for the food.

12:00pm
View the port from Portview
Portview Park and Middle Harbor Park are two of the best views of San Francisco and both underappreciated parks.  The perfect place to fly a kite with a strong wind coming off of the Bay, but on a sunny weekend the ideal place to see the port in action. 

2:00pm
Sandwich and the Redwoods
Stop off at Genova Delicatessen to grab a sandwich before heading off to the Redwood Regional Park for some hiking.  There are some great trails and views from up in the hills.  If you take a more meandering route to get to the park you might be able to drive through the Oakland hills stopping to ogle at some amazing homes.  You can see the very obvious line of where the 1991 Oakland hills fire stopped, because some of the houses look considerably bigger and newer than their neighbors. 

6:00pm
Dr. Comics and Mr. Games or Walden Pond
On the way back from the hills stop off at either Dr. Comics and Mr. Games or Walden Pond to indulge your inner fanboy by discussing endlessly discussing comics at Dr. Comics or gaze at the often strange titles on display in the window at Walden Pond. 

8:00pm
Stars before Dinner
With the late lunch it might be a bit early for dinner so if the night sky is clear then head back to the hills to the Chabot Space Science Center.  There are three telescopes available for free viewing on clear nights.  Two of the scopes are the original ones from the mid 1900s and have no machine control (ie everything is done by hand).  Outside there are many amateur astronomers who set up their personal telescopes and offer to let others view. 

9:30pm
Marzano
Newly opened in the Glenview District above Lake Merritt is Marzano.  A slightly cramped fit, but wonderful pizza restaurant.  The pizzas are cooked in a brick oven and when they come out hot are just perfect.  They are the right size for two people so that a soup as the side will make an ideal dinner.  The cocktails are also well thought out and have very clean refreshing flavors. 

11:00pm
Get Trapped
The ideal beer bar is the Trappist.  A draft list that typically has 15 beers on it many of which don't look familiar and the bottle list is even more extensive.  Don't go here looking for anything you are used to, but your unfamiliarity will be greeted with open arms as they will offer tastes of beers.  Be careful with the beers though, because many are high percentage alcohol and will hit you hard and fast. 

Sunday 10:00am
Farm Fresh on the Bay
On a nice Sunday morning nothing beats strolling along the waterfront while perusing farm fresh produce at the Jack London Farmer's Market.  Eat at the Farmer's Market or get fat with the Fat Lady.  The Fat Lady is particularly fun during Halloween and Christmas as they really decorate the space up well and make it better and better every year. 


 

Welcome to 30...the new 20?

Laying here on the couch on the morning of my 30th birthday I don't feel any different.  My fear that magically at midnight last night I would suddenly be beset with pains and ailments where there were none was proven wrong:).  This birthday has been one of reflection and contemplation.  Unfortunately a byproduct of this reflection is that I don't entirely want to do anything, which is a problem for the HyWy, friends, and other well wishers.  All week I have been fielding questions.  What are you going to do?  Are you going anywhere?  It's not that I'm not happy for by birthday, but it's just that I feel like some of the things we have done in the past restaurants, bars, clubs, etc. is boring.  Sure I want to see friends, but more importantly I have been wanting to consider what this means for me.  Am I where I want to be?  What changes do I need to make in my life to push or challenge me?  How can I achieve greater happiness on a daily basis?  Am I so caught in a routine that I am blissfully complacent as I watch birthdays start to roll by?  I told the HyWy that I feel like the celebrations began several months ago as we have been taking a series of short regional trips.  I don't believe that the celebration begins and ends today.  I read a quote today that said 30 is 365 days of self discovery and that one is not truly a thirtysomething until they turn 31.  Here's to the next decade and may it better than the last. 

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like a piece of you has been taken

As I have been reflecting on the past ten years I remembered the good (see the previous post) and the bad.  One of the bad things that comes to mind was when my roommate and I had our apartment broken into not even 6 months after I got out of school. 

I will never forget that feeling of walking into my apartment building to see all the doors kicked in.  The whole place was a mess and everything had been turned upside down.  They hadn't even taken that much of monetary value and no one was home when this happened which are both good.  However, what was taken were items of great sentimental value (for my roommate) and I felt like a piece of me was lost that day.  Looking back on the event in the aftermath I feel like it was hard to trust society and not have a jaded outlook.  One of the greatest losses was my newly acquired SLR camera which I was particularly excited about using.  I vividly remember thinking that it didn't matter to me if someone wanted it and were actually going to use it...then they could have it.  However, I knew all to well in our neighborhood that that camera was not going to be used by anyone and would more likely fund an addiction. 

Several years after this occurred a friend of mine was telling me that someone had told her about a "great deal" on a car stereo.  When she told me how much it was I knew immediately that the stereo must have been hot.  I told her that she shouldn't buy it because it was hot.   Justifiably so her argument was so what?  Until one experiences something like this it's difficult to convey to them why they shouldn't do their part to propagate this "industry".

10 yrs ago

In one week I will be turning 30 and it has given me cause to think back on who I was and what was going on in my life 10 years ago. 

10 years ago I almost exclusively listened to heavy metal and classic rock.  I wore glasses and had only started wearing contacts 6 months before my 20th birthday.  I did not own a cell phone and in fact was thrilled to just have a pager (courtesy of my job at Motorola).  10 years ago I would be commuting to a job at Motorola, which had me taking the same exit off of the highway that I now take to drive to my in-laws house.  I did not enjoy dancing.  I had never salsa danced.  I had never lived in an apartment on my own.  I certainly did not know how to cook.  Though I had visited India numerous times I had not yet truly appreciated Indian culture.  For the first time in my life I was truly living on my own as my parents had been living overseas for almost a year.  I had not discovered my passion for service work.  I had never meditated.  I had not found my creative outlet.  I had not developed a taste for beer (or any alcohol).  These are all things that have come to change and evolve over 10 years.

However, there are still some things that have remained unchanged.  I still love Cheerios.  As my love of music has diversified my appreciation of rock has grown deeper.  When in San Francisco I appreciate Atlanta more and while in Atlanta I appreciate San Francisco more.  I still enjoy movies and books as much as ever.  I would take a trail run in the summer rain over a urban run in the dry weather any day. 

And so the list goes on.  I wonder where I will be in another 10 years.  Here's to the start of the next list. 

Goodbye Solo

I heard from a friend that a friend of his directed a new movie, Goodbye Solo, which was dedicated to an amazing woman whom the HyWy and I helped tag several years ago.  The story of that tag and the woman cannot be done justice in a simple blog post so for that you will have to hunt me down and ask me in person:).  That said this post is about the movie.

Goodbye Solo like Blindness, which I already posted about, is not about reasons or the story so much as it is about the characters and relationships.  I'm not going to tell you the ending, but in my mind I could and the movie would still be just as compelling.  The story follows the unlikely friendship and bond between a young Sengalese cab driver and an older white customer whom he picks up one night over a week or so.  The two main characters, Solo (the cab driver) and William (the customer), are what propels this movie.  Solo is such a likeable, simple, and genuine person you can't help feeling what he goes through.  He has the kind of infectious smile and unflinching approach to life that I wish I always had.  William is the polar opposite.  An individual with a cold exterior who may reluctantly let you a tiny way into his life to begin to understand him.  Solo has a stepdaughter whose combination of innocence and maturity made me think of what the HyWy might have been like as a little girl.  One of the best parts of the film was that when a character frantically looks for something instead of focusing on all the places they looked the camera simply follows their eyes.  So much of this story was told through the actors eyes and expressions, which did far more than any dialogue could have done.  I definitely recommend going to see Goodbye Solo. 

What is this garbage I listen to?

The other day on the way home from work I decided to start listening to CDs again.  I was thumbing through my CD book in the car and I came across a burned CD that had no name written on it.  I've never not written the album/artist information so I was confused, but the CD was the brand we have at home so I knew I must have done it.  Inquisitively I popped the CD in the player and listened.  I went through every song and I couldn't figure out 1) what is this horrendous music? 2) what could possibly have possessed me to burn this?  I often will burn a CD for one song so I desparately skipped through tracks searching in vain for that one song to no avail.  As I listened to snippets of each song I was able to glean a few key pieces of information: the band was British, the production style set it in the mid 60s, the production style even felt vaguely like the Beatles early work, and the band was no one that I could easily recognize from early 60s Britain (ie the Rolling Stones, the Beatles, etc.).  Today in the office I brought the CD in for the moment of discovery as I would determine what this mystery CD was.  The answer: Piper at the Gates of Dawn by Pink Floyd.  Funny enough this album is very highly regarded and considered by some to be visionary.  I was impressed that I was able to nail the time period and country.  Even more impressive to me was that I was able to pick out that the producer was the original recording engineer for the Beatles for all their albums until Rubber Soul.  Now I know why I burned this album and I guess I'll give it another shot. 

Blindness

The HyWy and I saw a movie on Sunday night called Blindness starring Julianne Moore, Mark Ruffalo, and Danny Glover. 

What a movie it was.  It was an incredibly intense movie that takes a long and hard look at the presence or lack of morality and compassion in people particularly in times of despair.  The root plot was similar to 28 Days Later, I Am Legend, or Children of Men where a global epidemic causes mass panic.  However, there were subtle yet significant differences as this movie did not focus on the ailment (blindness in this case), cause, or search for a cure.  Instead it focuses on the lives of afflicted who have been relegated to a former mental hospital, because the disease is contagious.  What unfolds really reminded me of the Stanford Prison Experiment mostly because it showed how an individual's morality can really be pushed.  At one point the HyWy said that what made this movie so difficult was that there was no hope, but I disagreed.  I drew hope from the fact that despite the tremendous evils put forth by many of those in captivity, the rest of the society, and the government there were some in captivity whose ethical code was unwavering.  The movie also did a good job of showing how relationships can blossom or suffer in trying times.  Julianne Moore's character for whatever reason was immune to the disease, but she went along with her husband to the internment camp pretending to be blind.  In the camp it quickly became apparent that her inability to relate to his suffering and his inability to relate to her own suffering distanced them in their relationship.  Most of all I felt for Julianne Moore's character, because she could see the pain people were going through.  As people realized she could see she was somewhat unwillingly thrown into a leadership position or even that of a messiah.  What scared me most though about the movie was not that people could shift their morality, but rather that inhumanity and lack of compassion of the government is very reminiscent of real life today. 

From the Bay to the A

Well we are back in Bay after spending a week in the A.  I think this is one of the more relaxing trips to the A I have had in probably 2-3 years.  Most of the trips over the past few years have been with an agenda of some sort (weddings, wedding planning, etc.).  The agenda for this trip was simple: kick with fam and friends.  I can't believe how much the A has changed in the 5 years I have been gone.  I almost feel like the charm and the soul of the city that I loved so much is being sucked out slowly.  Don't get me wrong I still love the city, but it's different. 

It makes me sad to drive through neighborhoods that exuded a local feel and now have an enormous shopping mall with Target and Ross in them.  For example, I used to love going to Little Five Points when I lived in the A because it reminded me of the Haight in San Francisco.  It was a small area of 2 dozen stores and restaurants all of which were strange and quirky in their own way.  Now if you drive about 5 min past that little 'hood you find a shopping center that is filled with at least 3 haircut salons (3!), Ross, Barnes and Noble, and Target.  A friend who works at Barnes and Noble even confessed that she knows they are putting a lot of small bookstores out of business.  I understand that with development comes the need for more retail, but it is scary how soulless these retail plazas are.  I never imagined there would be a day when I could stand in a plaza in Little Five and not feel any different from being in Alpharetta (compare: stand in the Haight but feel like you are in Danville).  This style of building without character transcends just shopping plazas into even homes.  I lost track of the housing/condo developments we drove by where every single unit looked the same from the outside.  I apologize if anyone reading this has a home in one of those subdivisions, but I tend to appreciate it more when there is something to distinguish my home from the next on the outside.  Now the only way to have a unique home is to, god forbid, not buy a brand new home.  I would venture to guess that there is definitely a housing surplus in Atlanta, because I couldn't drive 5 min without seeing a new development.  I wonder how many of these developments will move forward and how many are on ice. 

The looks weren't the only thing different I saw in the A.  Maybe I'm the one who has changed, but at least one of my favorite joints failed me.  Back in the day I used to go to a burrito shop, Willy's, for great burritos.  We stopped in one day for lunch and I was very excited to have their burrito agaiin.  As I remembered the ingredients were extremely fresh, but there was definitely something missing: flavor.  I'm told that their quality has gone down, but I think that my experience was compounded by the fact that we get some awesome burritos in the Bay.  I'm not even going to attempt to put the Bay to the comparison on the soul food, because the A would win hands down. 

One thing that hasn't changed is my favorite burger and brew spot: the Vortex.  Their menu hasn't changed and nothing beats going there for a burger and a pint of Sweetwater 420.  I could drink 420 all day every day I was in the A, but alas that was not the case.  However, there is a Sweetwater drafthouse at the airport, which after some convincing from the HyWy I visited for a quick pint prior to our flight. 

At the end of the day I found that the A has changed.  I have changed.  However, some things still remain the same and it is still a great city.