In the face of humanity

This weekend we experienced humanity in it's most raw form.  It was simultaneously the most frightening and one of the most inspiring things I have ever seen.  

As we sat first in line at a traffic light waiting to turn left we witnessed a horrific car accident between a minivan and a SUV.  The details don't matter, but we watched a full size SUV roll multiple times like it was a toy car.  It is one of those things that you never forget.  To see the arm of one of the occupants of the SUV waving helplessly from underneath a car on it's side leaves me without words.  The fragility of life put on display as a result of someone's carelessness showed the dark side of human nature.  However, the moment everything stopped moving the beautiful side of human nature was equally apparent.  People from every car jumped out and descended on the two vehicles.  A group of people pulled the two occupants out of the SUV from the top and carried them to a little grassy patch.  Someone shouted from another car that they had gotten emergency assistance on the phone.  Another person took a position in the middle of the intersection to direct traffic.  It was amazing to see humanity slow down to help others amid the rush of daily life.

What does it mean to be a good parent?

As a new parent I seek validation to confirm whether I'm doing a good job as a parent.  I write this on my behalf and thus am not referring to 'we'.  The common question to my predicament is why do I need someone to tell me that I'm doing a good job.  One of the most obvious things to me as a new parent is how much I have been told what I am doing wrong.  This comes from doctors, nurses, relatives, and other experts.  I am not implying that in telling me what we are doing wrong it is a negative thing, because everyone is coming from a good space of just communicating what they know or has worked for them.  However, in all of that along with the constructive criticism it is very reassuring to hear people tell me that I am doing a good job.  Strangely the group of people that have most commonly told me that I'm doing a good job are friends that don't have kids.  That's not to say that no relatives, doctors, etc. have acknowledged what I am doing right.  In the end the validation of experts or anyone else feels good and feels reassuring.  

The effects of war

Americans that came of age in the aftermath of World War II were raised with a negative view of anything German or Japanese.  Reading a book about the experiences of soldiers, civilians, government officials, etc. during World War II I'm amazed at the amount of animosity towards Germans and Japanese.  Part of this was a propaganda effort by the government and part of this was based on the experiences of soldiers in the field.  Countless interviews with Americans has them extensively describing how much they hate the Japanese ("Japs"), but they felt more connected to Germans once they realized how 'similar' they were.  This attitude is what drives many people of that generation to exclusively 'buy American" and not purchase from companies like Toyota or Sony.  

Americans that came of age in the aftermath of the Vietnam War were raised with a negative view of the Vietnamese people.  This viewpoint was intensified with the influx of cheap labor particularly in the South where the climate resembles Southeast Asia.  

As we raise a child against the backdrop of a "war" on terrorism I can't help but wonder whether the little guy's friends will be raised with negative views towards Muslims.  Will this spillover onto our little guy?  Will he be shunned for what he is perceived to be?  I was born about 10-12 years after the peak of the Vietnam War and similarly our little guy was born about 11 years after 9/11.  The children that were too young to go to Vietnam, but watched their older brothers or grew up without fathers because of Vietnam were my classmates.  The classmates of our little guy will be children of parents who served in Afghanistan and Iraq.  

And so the cycle continues.  As each generation passes the same behaviors are further entrenched in our lives.